I'm sure you've noticed that we haven't posted a full body picture of our precious Amelia Jane publicly yet. We have shared these pictures with close friends and family and obviously those who have met her in person have seen all of her complexity.
I haven't been ready to share these pictures before now because I want to protect her. I want to protect her with everything in me from becoming a spectacle.
We knew before she was born that she would have many anomalies. We were called late Monday the 16th, and simply told that she had been born, was stable and they had taken her to x-ray. We had the most restless night of our lives until the next morning when we could finally meet her. No one prepared us for what we were about to see.
Before I became a mom 14 years ago, I wondered what emotions I would feel when I met my baby for the first time. I loved her from the moment I knew she was growing inside of me, but when the doctor placed a crying, red-headed Averie Elizabeth into my scared, unsure arms, instant, pure, unexpected, life changing love happened. It happened again with Austin Kathleen 3 years after that and with Atalie Layton 7 years after that.
The exact same instant, pure, unexpected, life changing love happened on Tuesday the 17th when I laid my eyes on Amelia Jane even though she did not grow inside my womb and even though she looked nothing like I expected.
I knew she would be beautiful. I knew I would love her. I did not expect her legs to be wrapped around the back of her body and touching her head. But she was still beautiful and I still loved her and I was still thrilled about the opportunity to raise her.
Her sisters and grandparents and aunts and uncles and our friends all wanted to see pictures.
So I sent them pictures of her precious and perfect face and gorgeous hair.
I sent them the pretty. I needed to process the rest.
The doctors had never seen anything like her. I couldn't fathom how her little body could even grow in the shape that was before my eyes. I was scared of what people would say about her, think about her. Would they love her like I love her?
One by one they started seeing her in person, grandparents, sisters, aunts, uncles, closest friends, and they each fell instantly in love with her too. They stood by her crib, took a moment to understand the complexity of her nature and adored her. I was both ashamed for doubting that they would do anything less and more assured of our future together in raising her with each visitor.
Our precious, brave, sweet, Amelia Jane has come so incredibly far since the day we met her two weeks ago. I have realized that by keeping these first pictures of her to ourselves we are keeping one of the most beautiful and most important parts of her story, the proof of God's healing power to ourselves. The power of prayer is real. You have earnestly prayed for her healing, so as hard as it is for me to post these, you deserve to see the proof of those prayers.
This is Amelia on 9/18 the day we arrived in Charlotte.
This is Amelia on 9/23 at one week old.
And this is Amelia yesterday, 9/30 at two weeks old.
God is good. So immeasurably good. At birth, I was convinced that they would have to remove her tiny legs from her body for her to grow. I didn't think she could be as straightened out at one year as she was at one week and at two weeks she is even more impressively straight.
Faith, Jaime. God hasn't brought us this far to leave us now.
The road ahead seems very long and narrow at times.
Then I look at that first picture. Faith.
He can do anything.
He may heal her completely. He has already done so much in two weeks. If he does, I will praise His Holy name. The doctors tell us there is no chance of that. They say she won't ever stand, walk or use her arms or hands. They also are shocked every time they pull back her blankets and see how far she has come from the day before, so I remind them who the Ultimate Healer is. We have shared the Gospel with more people in two weeks than we ever have in our whole lives and we are in ministry, so if the Lord needs to leave her broken for His Kingdom purpose, I will still praise His Holy name because I have seen what a magnificent testimony my tiny broken vessel is for Him.
Thank you for praying. Thank you for loving. Thank you for sharing this story for Christ's glory. God has orchestrated each detail of it so beautifully that even the parts that hurt are worth it. We are excited about how far He has brought us and excited about where He is taking us, wherever that may be.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11